Transmissions with Dad

-The only emails I have posted so far have resulted from correspondences with my mom.  I am going to break with this tradition and post the latest email from my dad as follows:

Dear Alex:

 

Guess what?  It is Christmas again.

 

You have been a good boy … as usual?. Senta has been a good dog. 

 

But will you guys make the next round? Talk to you soon.

 

I love you my son,

 

Dad

- The first thing I have to say is… WTF does “But will you guys make the next round?” mean?!? 

This to me sounds like some evil boss in a video game.  Like Senta and I just kicked some major ass on the streets…. we     thought it was over only to realize it was only the end of the first round. The second round will be 6 times more difficult (2 times more enemies, enemies are 2 times as large, and we are 2 times as weak as when we started). Probably one of us will not make it.

-Second, this sounds like a drunk email. Who says “I love you my son”? Only feudal lords or drunk dads. “You have been a good boy… as usual?.” The structure of this sentence oozes drunk as well.

-Finally… do you understand why I was destined to be insane?  

I’m Drunk

Hey I’m drunk.  What can I SAY It’s 4:17 in the morning. Rock out dudes and bros because tonight is your night.  You are the king of the castle….the tsar of the Kremlin… the President of the White House… the DUDE!

Old Toilet Spice

Just almost knocked my deodorant in the toilet.  Close call.

Transmissions with Mom

In an earlier post I mentioned how I set up a gmail account for my mom.   She writes me everyday.  None of our dialogue really has any purpose.  It’s kind of like two headless chickens emailing each other.

Latest email from my mom (it’s a long one but worth it):

Hey Alex,  happy St. Nick!   Just watched Boston Legal,  it’s so funny;  everybody in that cast is hilarious.  Last night I watched the case of Amanda Knox, a student from Seattle who is accused of murder in Perugia, Italy.  It is so bizarre -  she is still in prison,   You know I like stuff like that — her roommate, an English girl,  got raped and murdered by this drug dealer from Africa,  but this Amanda and her Italian boy-friend were somehow involved,  too.   The weird thing is,  I think it was all Harry Potter’s fault -  I think these books and movies are bad,  I can’t help it. The boy-friend got off, of course, because he was a prominent doctor’s son. (  supposedly a Harry Potter look-alike)  I am going to follow this case,  the trial is in January.   I wished i was a psychiatrist,  I would put her under hypnosis  — if she was on drugs,  she can’t remember a thing, but I think she remembers something – the local pub owner  had something to do with it, too.   There was definitely a ‘third’ force involved.   Call me – love, Mom